Our CSI approval expires the end of March. This means we have to update everything. Again. We discussed possibly changing countries. After all, if we had to update everything, now would be the time to do it. I actually called and spoke to someone about Lifeline's Ethiopia program, but the average wait time for a child under 5 could be up to 3 years!
After praying and considering different options, we've decided to continue on with our adoption from Uganda. Crazy? Maybe. But we have been at peace knowing it will happen in God's timing. I will admit for the first time I have found myself questioning. Would He have brought us this far, only to have the country shut down? After 3+ years of waiting? What if we got over there, met our son, and couldn't bring him home? How will we be able to be gone for 12 weeks? One of us or both? What about the kids? How will our finances be if I don't work for 12 weeks? Then today I read Matthew 6:
vs. 25: 'Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear...' vs. 27: 'Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?' vs 34: 'Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.'
So, with all that being said, I spoke to our case worker today. They have partnered with a new orphanage in Uganda. There are several children there who are in the process of being "adoptable". We had technically been #4 on the waiting list. Of the 3 waiting families in front of us, one has dropped out of the program, and the other 2 are on hold. Which makes us #1! I would like to think that we could get a call for a referral in the next month, but nothing has gone as planned, so we will simply wait and see.
There are so many 'unknowns' that we have to completely rely on God. No part of this process is or will be in our control. I have a similar feeling come over me like when I was pregnant with Trust. This feeling of the unknown and no control. Sounds scary, but in those times I experienced so much peace. It was then that we both learned how to trust God. Not just say we trusted God, but really know how to trust Him. You only name your son Trust if you really know how to trust! :) Or maybe it was when we started a church, 6 hours away from home, in a town where we knew no one. Maybe God started teaching us then what it meant to trust him, preparing us for when Trust would be born. I'm thankful for these experiences in the past that have taught us something we may not have truly known. I believe they have prepared us for such a time as this.
